Q: What does a Walrus and Tupperware have in common?
A: Their both looking for a tight seal.
Q: What do you call two skunks doing "69"?
A: "Odor eaters".
Q: Why does an elephant have 4 feet?
A: Because 8 inches isn't enough
Q: Where is an elephant's sex organ?
A: In his feet; if he steps on you you're fucked.
Q: What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A: How do you breath through that thing?
Q: What do elephants use for a tampons?
A: Sheep
Q: What do you call a herd of masturbating cattle?
A: Beef Strokenoff
Q: What do you call a cow with and abortion?
A: Decalfinated
Q: How do you know when an elephant's been fucking in your garage?
A: Your Hefty bags are missing.
Q: What is COYOTE UGLY?
A: When you wake up with your arms around someone sooooooooo ugly, that you
chew your arm off, rather than risk waking her up.
Q: Where do they get virgin wool?
A: Ugly sheep.
Q: What's worse than finding a worm in the apple you're eating?
A: Finding half a worm.
Q: What do you get when you put an experimental monkey in a blender?
A: Rhesus Pieces.
Q: Why do dogs lick their balls?
A: Because they can.
Q: What do you do with an elephant with three balls?
A: Walk him and pitch to the giraffe.
Q: How can you tell when an elephant's got her period?
A: There's a quarter on your bedstand, and your pillow is missing.
Q: What's the last thing that goes through an insect's mind when it hits the
windshield at 55 mph?
A: Its asshole.
Q: What has a hundred balls, and fucks rabbits?
A: A shotgun.
Q: Why don't bunnies make noise when they make love?
A: Because they have cotton balls.
Q: Why do Easter Bunnies hide their eggs?
A: They don't want anyone to know they've been fucking chickens.
Q: Where are an elephants sex organs?
A: In his feet, if he steps on you, your fucked!
Q: What's the black stuff between an Elephant's toes?
A: Slow natives.
Q: Why does an elephant have four feet?
A: Because seven inches would look silly on an elephant.
Q: What do elephants and Timex watches have in common?
A: They both come in quartz.
Q: Why is the camel called "the ship of the desert?"
A: It's full of Arab semen.
Q: What do you get when you cross a computer and a gorilla?
A: A Hairy Reasoner!
Q: Where do you find a Turtle with no legs?
A: Right where you left him.
Q: Hear about the guy who named his dog Herpes?
A: He heals once a month.
Q: What's the difference between a dog and a fox?
A: About four drinks.
Q: What's the difference between Beernuts and deer nuts?
A: Beernuts cost around thirty five cents, deer nuts are just under a buck.
Q: What's the difference between a moose and Lawrence Welk's orchestra?
A: On a moose, the horns are in front and the asshole is in back.
Q: How are a woman and a cow patty alike?
A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.